Lyrics

Lorna –
Mista Paper, Senator Pullman he just call
He ask how come ya don’t need no watah

Norman –
Don’t need water?

Lorna –
Well, you let the barge go by
He comin’ to talk to you

Norman –
Who is Senator Pullman anyway?
Why do I have to signal the barge?

Iris –
Welcome to the Caribbean
Put on a shirt at least
The big enchilada is on his way

Senator Pullman –
Mr. Norman Paperman, I presume?
Joinin’ us in Kinja for de tourist boom?

Norman –
Norman Paperman at your service
Meeting the kingpin, I’m slightly nervous

Pullman –
Mr. Paperman, I here to be your friend
But there’s just certain rules here we can not bend

Paperman –
How about the water? My cistern’s flat

Pullman –
Why sure, I come to take care of dat

But, you gotta play by Kinja rules
Forget about da tings you learned in school
We use a different box of tools
And you gotta play by Kinja rules

Pullman –
Now dis alien ain’t bonded for no gondolier
He’s bonded for gardener,
Dat why he here
De Chief of Immigration a power in dis town
Chief find out-your hotel close down

Paperman –
Hereafter gardening’s all he’ll do
I didn’t know, I swear to you

Pullman –
Doan’ hoross yourself, it’s okay mister
De Chief of Immigration, she’s my sister

But you gotta play by Kinja rules
Forget about that civics course you learned in school
We ain’t city folks, but we ain’t fools
And you gotta play by Kinja rules

Pullman –
Stop!

Paperman –
How about my water?

Pullman –
Hold you hosses I come to dat
Look at da chambermaid, she mighty fat
And if dat alien have her baby here
Dat baby American, free and clear
De Secretary of Interior, he gonna rave
And dat baby on your record
From da cradle to da grave
Your responsibility, I don’t mean maybe
Da bottom line sir, dat your baby

You gotta play by Kinja rules
Forget about da tings you learned in school
We use a simple box of tools
And you gotta play by Kinja rules

Paperman –
I’ll send her away, but this club’s bone dry

Pullman –
No problem, lots of watah you can buy

Paperman –
Buy water, Senator? That’s your advice?

Pullman –
Chief of Public Works give you a special price

Paperman –
Chief of public works,
Who’s he, your brother?

Pullman –
Ha ha, not bad she’s Lorna’s mother

So you gotta play by Kinja rules
Forget about da tings you learned in school
We use a different box of tools
And you gotta play by Kinja rules

Paperman –
Senator, I thank you
Now one thing’s clear
I’ve got to hire a Kinjan gondolier

Pullman –
Now dat a problem

Paperman –
What’s the reason

Pullman –
No unemployment, it’s high season
Can’t hire no Kinjan to wear dis hat

Paperman –
And I can’t use an alien?

Pullman –
Ah don’t ask dat

Paperman –
You’ve been a great help sir
You’ve got my vote
Just tell me, who’s going to row that boat?

Pullman –
Youuuu gotta play by Kinja rules
Forget about da tings you learned in school
Just take it easy, play it cool
But be sure to

Paperman joins Pullman –
Play by Kinja rules

You gotta play by Kinja rules
Forget about that civics course you learned in school
God watches out for drunks and fools
But forget the Ten Commandments here
Kinja rules Kinja rules Kinja rules Kinja rules

Pullman –
Norman Paperman, I feel you soon adjust to Kinja